So last night the stress finally got to me. The stress of working two weeks with only one day off, being tired all the time, my hands and arms going numb lately, the laundry, and our room just being dirty. I suppose it would have all been more tolerable if Jeff would have at least helped me out by doing some laundry or straightening up our room. But last night I got home, I wasn't feeling good and super hungry, and I go to make myself some dinner, and the ranch dressing was in the cupboard and not the fridge. I would have been fine if Jeff hadn't done his whiney "I'm Sorry" bit, but he did and that's when I just snapped. I threw my bowl down and went upstairs and started folding the laundry I had done earlier. Then he continues with the, "What's wrong?" and "Are you going to talk to me?" instead of just letting me calm down. So I started yelling, and he just kept sitting there, he hadn't done any of the stuff he said he was going to do. It wasn't that big of a list, throw some laundry in the wash and look for my check he'd lost. It would have taken him 30 minutes, and then that would've been fine, but he couldn't do it. It seemed to be the end of the world that I had asked him to do anything. And my stress was just building and building. And then I finally snapped, I started crying because it seemed he didn't care about me or us as a couple.
Here I am, with poison ivy on my breast [please don't ask how cause I really don't know], my arms and hands going numb no matter how I sit or lay or sleep which is causing me not to sleep, and just being tired all the time and not having the energy to do the cleaning. However, after my cry, I felt better letting it all out. Like the stress had been released from the cry and Jeff rubbing my back. I didn't eat much for dinner. I had a bowl of ice cream and then I had to sneak downstairs for a bagel because Jeff's dad was sleeping on the couch. Then we watched most of a movie and cuddled and just were in those lovey dovey comfort zones.
However, I was stressed when I got up this morning. I had this plan to clean and do laundry. Turns out, I can't, Jeff's mom's home. She's doing her own laundry, and I can't take the garbage out of our room. Or, I could, just Jeff doesn't want me to because ... because I really don't know. I just try to do the things he's asked me to. Even if that means sometimes I leave the shampoo and conditioner on the edge of the tub. [I'm not allowed to, otherwise it ends up on the back of the toilet.... don't ask.]
In other news!!! I've said this before, but Adam is home! We had a really good talk the other night about the pros/cons of me doing the gastric bypass surgery. He was really scared, which I found kind of touching and it made me cry a little. He was afraid that the chance of death was alot higher than we originally thought the first tiem we had had this conversation. Luckily, I had done my research and knew the statistics, and how it was done, and the pros/cons. So I was glad I was able to put his mind at ease. He'd been worrying that I was gonna have it done by the time he got back from vacation. But, it takes like a year from the point of making the appointement with the doctor to the actual surgery because I have to go through a ton of nutritionist appointments. But it was good to have that conversation with him, even if I did make a horrible joke.
And Leidy has been extremely nice to me lately. I'm not sure why, but she has. Like, she's been joking with me, and asking me to do things other than ringing people out. She's just been genuinely more polite I suppose is the word I"m looking for. Which is good because it's making work that much more tolerable. And now I'm off to eat something I'm freaking starving...
Here I am, with poison ivy on my breast [please don't ask how cause I really don't know], my arms and hands going numb no matter how I sit or lay or sleep which is causing me not to sleep, and just being tired all the time and not having the energy to do the cleaning. However, after my cry, I felt better letting it all out. Like the stress had been released from the cry and Jeff rubbing my back. I didn't eat much for dinner. I had a bowl of ice cream and then I had to sneak downstairs for a bagel because Jeff's dad was sleeping on the couch. Then we watched most of a movie and cuddled and just were in those lovey dovey comfort zones.
However, I was stressed when I got up this morning. I had this plan to clean and do laundry. Turns out, I can't, Jeff's mom's home. She's doing her own laundry, and I can't take the garbage out of our room. Or, I could, just Jeff doesn't want me to because ... because I really don't know. I just try to do the things he's asked me to. Even if that means sometimes I leave the shampoo and conditioner on the edge of the tub. [I'm not allowed to, otherwise it ends up on the back of the toilet.... don't ask.]
In other news!!! I've said this before, but Adam is home! We had a really good talk the other night about the pros/cons of me doing the gastric bypass surgery. He was really scared, which I found kind of touching and it made me cry a little. He was afraid that the chance of death was alot higher than we originally thought the first tiem we had had this conversation. Luckily, I had done my research and knew the statistics, and how it was done, and the pros/cons. So I was glad I was able to put his mind at ease. He'd been worrying that I was gonna have it done by the time he got back from vacation. But, it takes like a year from the point of making the appointement with the doctor to the actual surgery because I have to go through a ton of nutritionist appointments. But it was good to have that conversation with him, even if I did make a horrible joke.
And Leidy has been extremely nice to me lately. I'm not sure why, but she has. Like, she's been joking with me, and asking me to do things other than ringing people out. She's just been genuinely more polite I suppose is the word I"m looking for. Which is good because it's making work that much more tolerable. And now I'm off to eat something I'm freaking starving...
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